In the name of Allah, The Creator, The Sustainer, The Source of Peace.
Those who have believed and whose hearts are assured by the remembrance of Allah . Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah hearts are assured. (13:28)
Whoever does righteousness, whether male or female, while he is a believer – We will surely cause him to live a good life, and We will surely give them their reward [in the Hereafter] according to the best of what they used to do. (16:97)
One day, I wanted to go out with the husband. I was excited. Then, he heard there’s an online lecture that he wants to attend. I was annoyed. Then he told me, he could just listen to the recording. That was like a slap on my face. I had this mounting guilt. Would him sacrificing his love for ilm for me, enough to make me happy? No. I know it is going to haunt me forever.
I told him no. He is going to attend the online lecture. There’s always next time for us to go out. This is the husband that has been patience with me. He didn’t mind that I have to wake up at 2 am to attend online class, or that I have Quraan class on his off day. Then I realised, this is what makes me happy. Our mutual love for knowledge and us helping each other to attain Allah’s pleasure.
The same thing with my parents. My happiness lies when I help them seeking Allah’s pleasure. Teaching my mum Quraan, and showing her the sunnah makes me happy. I enjoy helping them as much as I possibly could.
Few weeks ago, I had a conversation with the sisters in my Quraan class on polygyny (Ah! Some would hate this). Alhamdulillah, it was a good conversation. We were open about it, and accepting. The key phrase here is “to seek Allah’s pleasure”. When we have only one goal in this life, which is “to seek Allah’s pleasure”, everything will come smoothly, insyaAllah. Yes, we may hit potholes and bumps, but we will get through it, InsyaAllah. Our dealing with the creations revolve around our eagerness to seek Allah’s pleasures. Once we are firmed on relying our happiness on The Creator, and we start following the guidelines in Islam (amongst them, the relationship between husband and wife according to Islam and parents and children), then we realised, that is our happiness. For example, we treat our husband nicely, because Allah has told us to. We treat our parents nicely, because Allah has commanded us to do so. If we want to seek Allah’s pleasure, we wouldn’t have any trouble accepting any tests and trials thrown to our faces. Eventhough some of them is hard to swallow. Remind me of this story told to us in one of our online class.
Urwah bin Zubair (RA) was a famous Companion of Prophet (Peace be upon him) and a profound scholar of fiqh (Islamic jurisprudence). He, who was blessed with immense knowledge, was tested by countless trials and tribulations. His leg was infected with gangrene- a fatal disease. He pacified the searing pain with the power of supplication. Physicians recommended to amputate his leg as there was no other remedy for the disease. He had to accept their recommendation owing to the unbearably burning pain.
As the day arrived for his leg to be removed, the physician came with a sedative medicine.. What is this for? Urwah (RA) asked. “To make you unconscious! You will not feel the pain then”. Physician’s reply made Urwah (RA) angry. “To make me unconscious? Then I don’t need this medicine! My heart is filled with the remembrance of my Lord. He is my strength and power. You may remove my leg, isn’t that all you need to do?”
The Physician was surprised. He amputated Urwah’s (RA) leg without any sedation. Praises of Allah reverberated on Urwah’s (RA) mind and tongue. Night fell and another sad tiding reached him- one of his sons fell off the horse and died. Two awful ordeals as far as a man is concerned. Loss of an organ and a son, both on the same day!
Urwah (RA) wished to see the amputated leg for the last time. Physicians handed over the still-bleeding leg to him. Looking at the leg, with a trembling heart he said: “O my leg, you are going to heaven. I swear by the One Who mounted me on you, I haven’t committed any sin with your help. By pressing your toes on earth, I haven’t walked into any wrongdoings. But I have walked into the house of Allah without bothering whether it was day or night, sunny or raining…”
That night, he supplicated deep down from his heart “O Lord! How Merciful You are! From birth till now how many organs You gave me! But You have taken only one back so far. You gave me six children, but You have recalled only one. You are Merciful and Loving”. (Incident mentioned in `Uddat as-sabirin wa dhakhirat ash-shakirin’ by Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyyah and ‘Hayat Al sahaba’)
Here’s the problem on why we failed to attain happiness. That happens when we put our happiness on the hands of the creations (on our parents, on our wives/husbands, on our children), instead of putting our happiness on The Creator. We expect the creations to bring us happiness. So when they hurt us, or failed to satisfy us, we got unhappy.
And whoever turns away from My remembrance – indeed, he will have a depressed life, and We will gather him on the Day of Resurrection blind.
He will say, “My Lord, why have you raised me blind while I was [once] seeing?”
[ Allah ] will say, “Thus did Our signs come to you, and you forgot them; and thus will you this Day be forgotten.” (20:124-126)
Here’s 10 steps to happiness :
- Seek the pleasure of Allah
- Be thankful
- Satisfy your soul
- Avoid Worldly comparisons
- Expect only from Allah
- Serve others and maintain relations
- Get adequate rest and organise your life
- Build a support group
- Eat Halal
- Keep Fit!
Source and further read : Here
May Allah guide us all to the righteous path, the way of the salaf-us-saalih. May Allah strengthened our eeman, and be steadfast in the deen. May Allah protect us from the evil ways and hellfire. Ameen Ya Rabb.